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Growing up, my parents were divorced, so every other Friday my dad would pick up my sister and me, and weād spend the evening shuttling back and forth between their housesāabout an hour each way. He had a Sirius XM subscription, so the car rides were full of 70s on 7 and 80s on 8. He could hear the first few chords of a song and immediately dive into how it was made, the backstory behind it, or some random trivia about the artists. I still think about him explaining the story behind Crosby, Stills & Nashās āJust a Song Before I Goā or Eddie Van Halenās solo on Michael Jacksonās āBeat It.ā
It was such a fun way to think about musicānot just as music, but sometimes as these tiny, collaborative moments of magic.
Not all the stories were fun, but they were always meaningful. Like todayāI was listening to Fiona Appleās Extraordinary Machine, most of it for the first time. I now have this habit of reading reviews and learning about how an album was made after I listenāprobably because of my dad being such a huge music nerd. This time, it led me down a rabbit hole about her partnership with Jon Brion, the fight with her label Epic Records over its
release, and all the b-sides/unreleased music and lore that I wasnāt expecting. Itās like discovering a missing piece to a larger cultural puzzleācontext that deepens your understanding and appreciation, even if it isnāt necessary to enjoy the music. š
Jan 7, 2025
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Throughout my whole life, I had awful music teachers. I had a piano teacher that made me sit on my hands because he was frustrated with the way I played scales and a music teacher in primary/middle school that gave me so many anxiety attacks that my doctor finally gave me a note so I didnāt have to go anymore.
I was told so many times throughout my life that I had no music talent, discouraged from going further than scales but all of those people (teachers!!!!) were wrong. They just couldnt fathom that I had a different musical brain than them.
When I was 23, I ended up having to move back home from LA after my job rescinded their promise to sponsor me for a visa. I was depressed and heartbroken and lonely. I went to school for writing but didnāt want to write anymore so I ended up opening GarageBand on my iPad.
I was inspired by all the things I could do on it. I suddenly felt like I was entering a new world. After making a couple beats, I started moving everything over to the laptop version of GarageBand. I bought big headphones, a cheap usb mic and a keyboard off of a guy from Craigslist and continued to tinker. One of my favorite things to do at the time was to download karaoke midi tracks of popular songs I loved, import them into GarageBand and change the instrument until I felt like I was making something new. I would then use my shitty mic to wail on top of it.
I used GarageBand for years after that to make tons of songs that I just uploaded to SoundCloud without thinking about it much. Eventually I got a controller/sampler and access to Ableton and thats when the fun really started.
My love for music making snowballed after that, I amassed more gear and skill and eventually made an album after a couple years. I was obsessed with making it and while I feel really whatever about it now, I donāt feel whatever about the experience.
Music has allowed me space to express parts of me that there are no words for. The best thing I can impart is to take advantage of this. There are some things that you can only explain with a kick drum or a sine wave or a really hard bassline.
Music is still a huge part of me! I made another album after that first and now Iām working on my next project. I recently reincarnated myself (everyone in the ~industry~ advised against this but Iām a different person now) and Iām excited to see whatās in store for me. I donāt expect to make money or become famous but music feeds my soul in a way nothing else can.
Have fun!!
May 4, 2024
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I know itās a fairly common thing but Iāve recently come so fond of listening to two or three songs before I go to bed. In a way that I kind of just stare at the wall and think of the day and contemplate but I canāt help but feel (I know this sounds dumb) that itās these like end credits to a really lovely movie. Except itās my day?!!
I dunno very dumb. I sometimes try to fall asleep with this music playing in my ears or behind my head tucked beneath the pillow so I can prolong this like climactic emotional expression to capstone the day. It always frustrates me when I eventually do have to sleep, turn the music off, and go off to dream in the quiet ambience of my room. My brain does sometimes keep the music blasting even without my earphones though which is very kind.
Music I feel justifies all these things happening in my life. As if it doesnāt hold value if the songs I listen to arenāt played. Itās like you watch a movie that you just love and sorta sit in awe as the credits roll and the music swells. Thatās how I feel about my day most nights! At least lately that is. Really lovely music squeezing my brain into an appreciative analysing ritual of the day.
Iām just yapping at this point but I can definitely attribute this to always having this deep urge for my life to amount to something worth telling a story about. I watch so many amazing movies and I think it would be such a waste to have the only amazing experiences I witness come from outside my life. Soooooooooo #romanticiseyourownlife I guess??
Just felt the need to express it. I had a good wall watching session just then listening to Broken Social Scenes album āYou Forgot It In Peopleā (too many bangers) and I couldnāt help but speak my mind about it :)
Feb 17, 2025
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there is no rhyme or reason to my taste in music. when i say i listen to everything, i mean EVERYTHING
i am in no way, shape, or form good at music analysis. this is all based purely on vibes. i like music. how much do i need to explain?
-CurrentsĀ by Tame Impala
the entire album. this is me getting into the psychedelic, dance type beat. and i really like it. itās different but still similar to the pop that i typically enjoy. my favorites off the album are āMomentsā, āLet It Happenā, āCause Iām A Manā, and āThe Less I Know The Betterā. despite being this funky synth stuff, itās all still super depressing. the lyrics are just like that. and as someone who has been deeply in her feels recently, this is exactly what i need.
and on a similar note,
-āBorderlineā by Tame Impala
same gist asĀ Currents. except this song is more about the stoner stuff (which i am not) but itās still a bop. i love the funk i love the synth i love the lyrics and the overall vibe.
-āHere With Meā by d4vd
i think i found this one off of some indie playlist Spotify made (yes i know itās also a TikTok song). but i really like it. itās the perfect song to belt out and be sad i donāt have a partner to. itās just one of those songs that hits you in the feels. and, again, lots of feels are happening lately. and with this one, iāve got this crush i canāt shake, and this song definitely does not help it. but i still love to sing it and be delusional.Ā
lol so i posted this song on my Instagram note and my best friend replies āooooh who is this about?ā and i go āno one unfortunately i just like the song šā and her response is just āšššā
-ā(I Canāt Get No) Satisfactionā by The Rolling Stones
i play two The Rolling Stones songs and now my mom wonāt stop calling me an āold soulā. but its among The Rolling Stonesā most popular songs, like?Ā
but still, i like the older rock stuff like this. the guitar and the bass and the drums and the tambourine and the vocals are just peak.Ā
granted i canāt really relate to the sexual frustration and commercialism, but do i really need to in order to like the song?
-āAll Starā by Smash Mouth
slightly out of left field with this one, but as i said, my taste in music is all over the place.Ā
we all know and love the alternative rock and power punk (yes i stole this right from Wikipedia) of the song. and this song ofc was part of my recent Smash Mouth bingeā¦
but outside of the memes, this song is a bop. everything just works. itās great.
i have no idea what the hell im saying cuz im shit at musical analysis but I LIKE THE SONG. DO I HAVE TO SAY WHY. WE ALL LIKE THE SONG SO WHY SHOULD I EXPLAIN WHEN THERES NO POINT
ok rant over. lol
i like music. i listen to a lot of it. and this all is kinda just to expose my music tastes because honestly, i have a pretty good taste in music if i do say so myself.Ā
May 8, 2025
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Apr 28, 2025
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got me giddy as hell packing my bags and picking up my sweet little treats
weāre gonna spend the night exchanging hot goss and our silly little secrets
iām over here kicking and swinging my little feet in anticipation
this really this is a love letter to my girls. i love you and iāll see you sooonnnnnn
{\_/}
(>.<)
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Dec 14, 2024
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nothing better than knowing what makes you feel and look good and sticking to it. i know an all black fit or big sweater-skirt-with-tights combo hate to see me comin š
Dec 13, 2024