Rec | I’VE TYPED A FEW THINGS OUT BUT ENDED UP NOT SHARING THEM

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Rec'd on 🐦 Have you ever chAnged or deleted something you wanted to post here because you didn’t think it would get likes?

I’ve typed a few things out but ended up not sharing them

Not out of fear of lack of likes or engagement. I mean, I’ve just joined, but so far I think this app is pretty neat, in the sense that it doesn’t feel like a “oh, I’ve got to curate this thought or personal share until it’s whittled down and not actually *me* anymore - so that it’s more widely appealing or relatable” kinda thing y’know? Doesn’t feel like it’s about amassing followers, monetisation, or becoming an *influencer*. Pretty certain that everyone has had angry, dark, bitter, jealous, painfully yearnful, embarrassing moments and feelings. And the kind of thoughts that are “nope, can’t say that. that’s overshare territory babey”- or like there’s that feeling of “would I want that being screenshotted?” hanging over ya. I don’t feel disgust when I’ve read others share those things on social media or when my friends confide in me, but I still feel shame for feeling them myself? How silly. One thought that I’ve considered sharing on here, but yeeted into the void has been about my identity, erosion of sense of self, and self image. Existential dread, stential(?) dread. Which is, like, *yeah*, everyone (to scaled degrees, especially based on your race, gender, sexuality, class, ALL of the above) can probably relate to by virtue of existing in this shitty framework of a society where everyone’s physical, intellectual, and material image is always going to be scrutinised. Which I know? But I still struggle with writing or articulating things like “hey, I’m *not* doing okay with this and I don’t know what to do about it. I don’t like where I am, but thinking about change scares me. Sometimes, maybe all the times, I don’t know who I am or what I’m doing outside of the perception of others and that really fucking terrifies me.” I don’t know, I’ve deleted most other of my social media accounts and only really yap to my close friends about deeply emotional and intimate *struggles*. But I still feel like flinging things out there sometimes to strangers (which I guess I’ve just done here lol). It’s a different kind of vent release, a type that you don’t have to worry about extremely concerned follow up questions from friends or family haha. Or like, the feeling that even though we’re strangers from all over the place, we all share in the relatable struggles and joys of the human condition - whether through personal shares or *memes and shitposts* The candid pet pics are cool too tho

@softshelled

Jan 18, 2025

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@arljjas

No bad first drafts! Post away

Jan 18, 2025

@bee1000

Thank you for replying so thoughtfully. I hope you’re right about people not trying to curate their lives here, and the similarities I feel between posts is just because users have a lot in common. I empathize completely with the idea of changing being scary even if I want to do it! Existential was the word you were looking for ✌️

Jan 18, 2025

@rocky1111

there are just not enuf ppl on pi

Jan 18, 2025

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LETTING YOURSELF HAVE FEELINGS

ive recently been inspired by a friend to actually share my feelings. not in a silly, self-deprecating way anymore, but in a ‘i’d like to talk to someone who would actually listen’ serious way. he’s got a blog on here too, and yes, he’s literally promoting it and it’s out to the public, but it still feels weird to read bc it is such a personal thing. but i think there’s beauty in sharing personal feelings like that. ive been joking saying im just exposing myself, but releasing these feelings is what i need. i need to learn to open up and stop bottling everything up and pretending im ok (side note - i actually have no idea what ok actually is. sometimes i think i am actually fine and happy, that these are just regular people problems, that sometimes im just blowing this out of proportion. but sometimes i also think these problems shouldn’t be minimized and that talking with someone (either a journal like this, a friend or trusted adult, or a legit therapist) would significantly benefit me) and before anyone goes saying ‘jUsT tAlK tO a THerApiSt’ i’m seriously considering it. i’m just trying other alternatives before i commit to something. plus my last attempts at therapy did not inspire confidence in the practice. i’ve got a journal i’ve been writing in for nearly nine months now, and while it is nice to write, idk i feel like screaming into the void and maybe someone who feels the same way i do seeing this will make it feel even better. plus im too stingy with the way i have my journal set up. it’s more to just document my day with the occasional feelings (or 6 pages worth of feelings), but this blog is for long-form, organized feelings. (plus typing is much nicer than writing by hand for longer things like this) i’m also gonna try and remember to add songs recs (the entire reason for this app, right?) that vaguely correspond with the content of the post. recently, i’ve added A LOT of songs to my playlist. most notably “Basket Case” by Green Day. it’s been on repeat lately. it kinda just matches the confusion and chaos yet self awareness i’ve been feeling recently. i’m not the best at music analysis (which also is kinda the point of this app ._.) so i’ll just say: i just like everything about it. it’s relatable, it’s fun (take that with a grain of salt, but ykwim), it’s catchy. it’s a good song to belt out when im home alone and feel like singing something with deep meaning behind it (pls don’t come at me for not being able to analyze lyrics. i’m not smart enough for that) (ok there i go again on my own putting myself down. but what i mean is im just not good at analyzing literature and stuff) ok well im looking through my friend’s blog that inspired all this, and he goes a lot more into the music rec part (which, again, the point of this app), with the feelings tied in. but they’re also a huge music nerd and i’m not. and a large part of why im doing this is the catharsis with the music recs as a secondary priority. (tbf we all probably already know and love “Basket Case”) but idk y’all are weird. i saw someone just recommend their cat so. (tbf, i recommend my cats too). i mean the big recommendation for this post is expressing feelings and not bottling them up. it’s really helpful just getting it all out. anywhooooo, i like yapping, in case it wasn’t obvious. and if i do it like this it’s faceless to a bunch of people who will a) never see it or b) never know who i am or c) not care or d) relate to my problems and give some good advice and tell me im not alone. ok this is already doing its job. im enjoying writing this shit down. it’s cathartic! i feel so much better just getting these feelings out and not bottling them up!

@jill_m56

4d ago

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Reccing to no one and for no one in particular

I am going to speak on this both within the PI.FYI ecosystem and outside, in my real life. I consider myself to be gregarious in a way where I am often holding wonderful conversations with wonderful people who do not share my interests. By being immensely charming and well-spoken (or perhaps by having very very patient friends and acquaintances), I find myself able to talk about things I like without boring another person. I don’t think a lot of my taste is something that goes viral with people on this site, or is interesting to people who I get along with. I’m a gemini and I do feel the pull to try and alter myself to who I’m talking to, but I think the ability to just be earnest about yourself will get you way farther and help you develop much more meaningful relationships than just Mirroring Your Way Through Life. If you lead through life with a genuine desire to connect and care and make people leave the room feeling better, I don’t think it matters if you’re a geek or freak, I think it just matters that you were honest. I’ve had one or two viral posts on PI.FYI, but the recs I’ve been most excited to write are for a comic book or video game. Those recs don’t get any likes at all. And honestly I think that’s perfectly fine, because beyond being just a platform to connect with earnest people, this is an archive of interests and personality. In 700 years when the digital museum archivists are sifting through all the internet servers that haven’t eroded, putting together The Final Digital Archive Of You or Somebody or Whatever, I put something out there that was a little bit honest. Though, I don’t think I have the impulse to leave behind a perfect digital representation of myself. I think the most important things in life are things you can’t leave behind, because they are moments that are meant to be forgotten when you and everyone you know are gone. But one day someone’s going to be in a boring university library sifting through my recs on Grant Morrison’s bibliography, and they’ll be Wondering Why I Felt That Way. And by and large they’ll know.

@brendanooooo

Apr 6, 2025

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thoughts

i’m not sure what area you’re studying/working on, and which is the basis of your essay - also, as a newbie who isn’t well-versed on the culture here - i guess i’ll just say some random misc thoughts about my experience so far! there is something about this interface, i.e. the fonts, the emojis, the formatting, the colours, etc, that’s all so incredibly nostalgic of early tech. it looks like an elevated version of the bare websites they had us build with html/css in ict class. it also feels like a more text- and community-based tumblr, another platform that i found a lot of comfort and joy being on. i don’t have the introspection or technical knowledge to pinpoint what exactly it is about PI, and similar platforms (like tumblr) that makes them safe and comforting/less stressful to use compared to others, so i’d be interested in seeing whether this is something your essay will touch on, or define! maybe it’s because it’s still new and with a smaller user base than Big SM™️ sites, but the culture here doesn’t seem to care about how many followers you have, or in getting the highest amount of engagement on everything you post! it‘s an even playing field where everyone i‘ve seen is just enthusiastic, helpful and thoughtful in their recs or general comments. a small detail, but i also like that specific “like“ numbers aren’t displayed - it (maybe unintentionally?) removes a lot of subliminal pressure to up that figure! PI is a happy, unencumbered space that makes you feel like a (pre-)teen exploring early tech and social platforms again, except instead of it being a collection of people u know irl, it’s basically a bunch of friends from all over. and that’s something that’s been sorely missed, or perhaps even erased, from the cultures of other social media sites. there’s so much individualism and criticism there, and when you don’t receive engagement, you’re basically talking to yourself bc the algorithm won’t pick up your posts & have them show up for other people. there’s always something so special and personal when social sites such as this are in their early days, when the people participating are still genuine in their pursuit on them. the people gravitating towards being here are probably looking for the same thing as well, so i hope for nothing more than for it to stay like this.