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they’ll ask you if you want a box, and you‘ll just look them in the eyes and tell them no!!!
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No I just live a sensuous snacking lifestyle…
Nov 25, 2024
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These aren’t for every table, i kinda litmus test the guests in my intro to see what kind of bits they can tolerate. I ~work~ for my tips.
We have a roll called the hoki poki, so anytime someone orders it i call and repeat “turn yourself around”, if the table gets a kick out of that, i’ll spin in a circle when i drop it off.
Anytime someone orders the crispy rice i say “yep defffffinitely been here before”
When i check the birthday guest‘s ID I say “wow it REALLY is your birthday”
When i serve a couple celebrating an anniversary, i’ll ask how many years and then be like, “congrats on the love and stuff,” (very buffy coded)
When a guest asks where a certain fish is from, before i tell them the real answer, ie alaskan salmon, i say “the ocean”
Aug 8, 2024
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i said that so smoothly and confidently and wasn’t weird at all
Mar 16, 2025
Top Recs from @champagnefluke
an older couple came in for dinner and totally stiffed me on the tip which was disappointing but shitty tips and math mistakes happen on occasion, so though I was disapointed because I thought we were vibing, I entered the bad tip and got on with it. they came back as soon as we opened the next day with an envelope with $10 and this note. I love that they went above and beyond even for a small mistake like this, I wouldn’t have remembered in like a week but the universe tracks on this stuff yknow.
Apr 15, 2025
Apr 30, 2025
and in the year of our lord 2025? a delightful pastiche
Apr 20, 2025