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I went away with my dad and sister. I stayed in the pool until my fingernails turned purple, like tiny bruises. Bought a few things at a flea market that felt like a ghost town, like a place everyone had left in a hurry. In the womenās restroom, I met two grannies. They adored my shoes, told me I looked so young (I needed that) and complimented my hair. One told me to fill in my eyebrows; the other said to stay exactly as I am. They couldnāt stop laughing and teasing each other. One of them said, āWeāre young too, weāve just been young longer than you.ā It made me smile. They reminded me of Miss Spink and Forcible from Coraline.
Later, I had a few hallucinations, the sink water turned into blood while I was washing my hands, and I felt spiders in my hair
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4d ago
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I was lucky enough to visit both Connecticut and Missouri this summer. I usually do every other, but my whole family was going to be in Connecticut so my two kids and I went just for the weekend. I got to see my younger sisters that live in Spain for the first time in two years.
This summer has flown by and I am making a point to enjoy the rest of the season as much as possible. This is the first year in the last couple that I havenāt been looking forward to the next thing. I avert my gaze every time Iām in a store that already has Halloween stuff out. Letās just be where we are, shall we?
Aug 22, 2024
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I hadn't been to Washington in years. I had foggy memories of Seattle--the way the city is both dark and vibrant, plants overtaking front lawns and vines dripping off freeway overpasses. How forgotten cars on side streets are slowly overcome by moss and seem to decay like wet logs in a forest. I wanted to see it again and do some solo traveling in the Pacific Northwest, so I flew in with a full itinerary and rented a car.
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My best friend Lucien and his partner had just bought a house in Seattle and I was the first guest. Before I even landed, they were enlisting me to help hang frames and paintings. As I made my way down Rainier Ave, things started to look familiar, or feel familiar. Like finding yourself back in a reoccurring dream. This feeling got stronger and stronger as I got closer and closer to the little pin on my phoneās map, my friendās address. I pulled onto their street and parked. And stared.
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My mom lived in Seattle when I was in 8th grade, and I would visit her. She lived in this little house, directly across the street from where my friend was still unpacking boxes and getting forwarded mail. Around the corner was the shopping plaza I would run to get Chinese for us, where I would play Street Fighter on the arcade. Down the street was the park where I played soccer. Up the hill was a bank with a gnarled tree that always fascinated me. Places that seemed so vague before but were now so real. 20 years later!
Mar 29, 2024
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so there were lots of nice moments!! among my favorites:
ā¢ saw a great movie at my friendās favorite and very cool theater
ā¢ enjoyed the presence of other writers during an hour of work on our projects
ā¢ explored a quirky used bookstore
ā¢ had several late night, falling-asleep-as-youāre-speaking chats with my friend of 26 years, just as weāve always done
ā¢ laughed hard
ā¢ friend beat me to saying āi love youā and i realized how often iām the first to say it in relationships/interactions and hearing it offered (instead of automatically returned) helped balm something i didnāt know was wounded
ā¢ proved to myself that even though i can never outrun my OCD, i can do more alongside it than i thought i could
Mar 21, 2025
Top Recs from @Deadfisshh
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I donāt mean to sound vulgar, but honestly, my tits are amazing
I like my hair too, but itās only like 50% of the time, so I donāt know if that even counts
Jun 11, 2025
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Stop talking so much ā most people donāt care, and you never know what you should say or keep to yourself. You share too much, you say everything you think because youāre desperately craving approval. Just stop talking so much
May 30, 2025
1d ago