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if all of the music you listen to reminds you of her try replacing the "you" in the songs with yourself. there's a song that goes "lately I've been missing you" and instead of the "you" being someone else, now it's me and the happiest most true version of myself. i miss that guy and i love that guy and doing this helps to bring him back. this helps to recenter your emotional well-being off of someone else and onto yourself. you've got this ♥️
May 19, 2025
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i think it’s so easy to get caught in the throws of life that you start to lose yourself a bit. take up new hobbies, listen to the music you used to love, watch some comfort films. do things that remind you of a time when you remembered you. and if those things don’t fit anymore, find someone else. find the things that feel like home
Apr 19, 2024
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got this from the book "this is me letting you go" by heidi priebe - which i also very much recommend - but to paraphrase, she says sometimes the biggest things you miss from a relationship are needs that are no longer being met, or ways you showed up/things that were brought out of you with x person that you miss, maybe moreso than the person themselves.
So, if you always went to art shows, finding another friend to connect with over that. Or if you only showed your vulnerable side with that person, redirecting and learning how to meet those needs for vulnerability with others. If you always laughed together, maybe watch a standup special. or if they made you dinner after a long day, order takeout when it gets hard and show up for yourself. etc etc on small and large scales! this is what saved me from the hardest times.
Plus also truly time as has been said. it will ebb and flow and everything is temporary - you will feel light again when the time is right! ❤️🩹
Mar 26, 2025
Live with heartbreak for a while. It‘ll be different but the same. You’ll forget why and then remember and feel it all over again. Delete their pictures but keep them in a secret folder on your phone so you can cry by yourself watching their face smile at you.
Re-learn old habits you’ve forgotten you even enjoyed because you strayed so far away from who you once were.
In some odd way you’ll have to re-learn happiness, too. Well, not so much re-learning it but changing its meaning, find new ways to feel fulfilled, the same way you once felt with them.
Make some more lame playlists with oddly specific titles so you at least feel like you’re making something out of all the quiet pain you feel inside.
And wonder. A lot of wondering. All the time. Everywhere. In your house. At your job. Inside your body and next to you in the bed you once woke beside them, smiling.
And you’ll never forget, but it will get painfully easier.
May 7, 2024
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in my opinion a strong contender for the most beautiful place in the usa. it feels like home to me and i cannot wait to be there again. hope you can make it there someday :)
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you have to remember that as urgently as you search for your family, they too search for you
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